Women Issues
God forbid... I didn't post yesterday. You know when you suddenly get hooked on an old video game and you can't stop playing? Well, that's what happened to me... kinda. You see, yesterday, I had some "women's issues" that just TOTALLY made my day. If you're a guy reading this, I know you're like "omg... not another bitch tale." But please boys, hear me out. You are not a woman, you never have been one, and (hopefully) you never will be. YOU HAVE IT FREAKIN' GREAT! Now, I'm not saying that being a woman is ALL bad, everything has its ups and downs, but yesterday, it was definitely a down.
First off, it was that super-fun-happy time of the month where you spend an entire day curled up in your bed, watching TV (or playing video games in my case), popping more pills than a hooker, and bitching out the entire WORLD who happens to pass by you. And you know what? 99% of that day SUCKS. But the day before is freakin' GREAT!
If you didn't know by now, there's this thing called PMS, and you know what? I LOVE it! For one day, I can yell, bitch, scream and get my way... and I don't feel sorry for doing it at ALL! PMS gives me this power that makes me seem invincibe! But you know what? All of that power gets tossed into the garbage along with the used pads the next day. Everything has an equal and opposite reaction eh?
Now, when you're a woman on that horrible day, you know that you don't wana do anything but cuddle in bed and ANY person who tries to remove you from your comfy, warm place is damned to be run over by an SUV. So, while cuddling in my bed the night of my "friend"'s visit, my sister wanted to go to Starbucks. Personally, they're overpriced and their crap isn't great anyway. Somehow, my sister thinks its like a church cause she goes there ALL the time... no wonder she's broke. So aaaaanyway, she drags me out of my warm bed at 10PM to go to starbucks...because GOD FORBID she goes alone >.> So what do I have to do? I have to get changed out of nice, warm pyjamas, hop out of my nice warm and fuzzy bed, and go out into the relative cold night to get an overpriced drink. Fan-freakin'-tastic. Nobody there opens the door for me, or helps me carry drinks, or even GIVE A CRAP THAT ANYONE'S DISABLED! But that's beside the point. The point is that I had to get dressed, and that's quite a hassle.
You see, besides having fun, week-long visits from our best friend, we also have to wear these HORRIBLE things called "bras." They never fit right, they're always to big or too small, and, like all conspiracies, they're always out to get you. Most women are around a B or a C size, usually 36 or 38 inches, so that's the size they usually make bras in, which is understandable. But unfortunately, I'm not a B or a C or even a D. I just happen to be the lucky owner of a pair of 32DDD. Yes, I'm 32 inches around my bust. Yes, I've been measured properly. But you know what? That means NOTHING when you're shopping for a bra.
I guess companies assume that people with DDD MUST be fat, because the SMALLEST I've seen a DDD come in is a 36, which is WAY to big for me. So, even if I try one on, it's way too big. So I have to usually resort to wearing a DD because they make those in a 34. Still a bit big, but better than nothing, or so it seems. As I type this, I'm wearing a 34DD that's too wide around and my chest is literally "popping out." Now, if you had to live with people staring at YOUR chest all the time, you'd appretiate it if some morons at Wonderbra would recognize people with large breasts and DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT! Who knows, they might even get MORE customers! XD
First off, it was that super-fun-happy time of the month where you spend an entire day curled up in your bed, watching TV (or playing video games in my case), popping more pills than a hooker, and bitching out the entire WORLD who happens to pass by you. And you know what? 99% of that day SUCKS. But the day before is freakin' GREAT!
If you didn't know by now, there's this thing called PMS, and you know what? I LOVE it! For one day, I can yell, bitch, scream and get my way... and I don't feel sorry for doing it at ALL! PMS gives me this power that makes me seem invincibe! But you know what? All of that power gets tossed into the garbage along with the used pads the next day. Everything has an equal and opposite reaction eh?
Now, when you're a woman on that horrible day, you know that you don't wana do anything but cuddle in bed and ANY person who tries to remove you from your comfy, warm place is damned to be run over by an SUV. So, while cuddling in my bed the night of my "friend"'s visit, my sister wanted to go to Starbucks. Personally, they're overpriced and their crap isn't great anyway. Somehow, my sister thinks its like a church cause she goes there ALL the time... no wonder she's broke. So aaaaanyway, she drags me out of my warm bed at 10PM to go to starbucks...because GOD FORBID she goes alone >.> So what do I have to do? I have to get changed out of nice, warm pyjamas, hop out of my nice warm and fuzzy bed, and go out into the relative cold night to get an overpriced drink. Fan-freakin'-tastic. Nobody there opens the door for me, or helps me carry drinks, or even GIVE A CRAP THAT ANYONE'S DISABLED! But that's beside the point. The point is that I had to get dressed, and that's quite a hassle.
You see, besides having fun, week-long visits from our best friend, we also have to wear these HORRIBLE things called "bras." They never fit right, they're always to big or too small, and, like all conspiracies, they're always out to get you. Most women are around a B or a C size, usually 36 or 38 inches, so that's the size they usually make bras in, which is understandable. But unfortunately, I'm not a B or a C or even a D. I just happen to be the lucky owner of a pair of 32DDD. Yes, I'm 32 inches around my bust. Yes, I've been measured properly. But you know what? That means NOTHING when you're shopping for a bra.
I guess companies assume that people with DDD MUST be fat, because the SMALLEST I've seen a DDD come in is a 36, which is WAY to big for me. So, even if I try one on, it's way too big. So I have to usually resort to wearing a DD because they make those in a 34. Still a bit big, but better than nothing, or so it seems. As I type this, I'm wearing a 34DD that's too wide around and my chest is literally "popping out." Now, if you had to live with people staring at YOUR chest all the time, you'd appretiate it if some morons at Wonderbra would recognize people with large breasts and DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT! Who knows, they might even get MORE customers! XD
posted by Justine at 6:18 p.m.
2 Comments:
Hmm, no desire for truth. Keep the masses ignorant. I'd do the same. Kudos.
Still think you're a male.
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